Ever Been Treated So Well By A Company You Got Them A Gift? Well, Now You Have…

Krypton Products Receives Gift From Customer – Just For Being Awesome (And Boy Do We Love Getting Gifts…Hint hint)

Well folks, if there’s one thing I love it’s presents. Any kind really, once I got a jar of jelly for Christmas from an uncle – not a showstopping gift by any means – but I loved every bit(e) of it. Nothing says “thank you” or “I care” better than a well thought out little piece of something (whether it be a card, box of chocolate, or new helicopter).

About two months ago I was helping a gentleman living in Jamaica purchase a product from our website. At the time, our website wasn’t setup for international sales so I had to get a little creative with the transaction. We went back and forth a few times and eventually came to a reasonable solution for the sale…

A few weeks later, I receive this in the mail…an authentic bag of Jamaican coffee sent from my new friend overseas! It smelled delicious, tasted even better. At first, I couldn’t even fathom what I was looking at when I opened the bag. I was scared to even look inside. I thought this guy was unhappy with the transaction and maybe had sent me a bag of manure or something. But no – a delicious bag of tasty coffee. I couldn’t believe it!

And then two thoughts occurred to me:

1) How amazing is this guy for sending me this. What a wonderful gift!

2) What if all of our satisfied customers sent us gifts? How cool would that be?! Instead of customer and seller, we’d be like friends.

With that, I’d like to extend this invitation to all you Krypton customers/fans/friends out there…If we do a good job taking care of you, and you have extra paperclips, thank you cards, silverware, tea, face lotion, Mercedes Benz. or other nick-knacks laying around, please send them to us as a gift! We’ll feature it on our blog and you’ll be positively reinforcing our already exemplary customer service. Notice the highlighted and italicized word “if” at the beginning of that sentence. If we don’t do a good job, you have every right to yell at us and tell us what jerks we are (and we’ll do everything we can to take care of you).

Anyways, just a thought. Oh another interesting story on the subject of customer service, I had a woman raving to us about how great our service was just because I got back to her the same day without a “boiler plate” email about an issue she had! What does it say about our world when a person is shocked by a quick, personalized response? Whatever it says, it isn’t good, I can tell you that.

Oh – and in case it wasn’t clear from all the back-patting I did in this article…I rock.

What’s your best/worst customer service story? (We’d love to hear other great ideas!)

All the best,

MR. Krypton

Small iPhone Accessory Firm to Annihilate iPhone’s “Scratched Screen Repair” Industry

Screen Scratch Repair Industry sort of looks like this yellow guy

Krypton Products Prepares for launch of Industry Killing iPhone Screen Armor Line

To the chagrin and frustration of “screen scratch” repairmen everywhere, up and coming iPhone Accessory firm Krypton Products LLC is in preparation to release its new Screen Armor line of iPhone screen protection. Consisting of the Screen Armor Ultra Clear, Screen Armor Anti-Glare, and Screen Armor Privacy, Krypton’s new line of products will not only give iPhone users sleek and functional protection for their phones, but also use a mighty corporate fist to deal a powerful and crushing blow to the struggling iPhone screen scratch repair industry.

“I guess the best we can hope for is a corporate bailout” says Jonathan Foster of Detroit Michigan’s “iFix”, a local iPhone scratch repair shop. “Once people get a hold of this Screen Armor nonsense, we’ll all be out of a job. This place’ll be a ghost town in no time.”

Foster, a proud sixth generation iPhone scratch screen repairman, then added, “my granddaddy’s granddaddy started iFix when the first generation iPhone came out. I’ll be darned if any fly by night company comes in and runs me out…I don’t care how sleek or functional their products are.”

Made with three layers of tough scratch resistance, Krypton’s Screen Armor line will not only provide users with added iPhone screen protection, but will also allow for greater touch navigation to help users glide even more effortlessly from menu to menu.

In a recent interview, the malevolent and soon to be corporate powerhouse Krypton Products refused to acknowledge its potential affect on the sad screen scratch repair industry, “I didn’t even realize there was such an industry,” said Marketing Manager Robert Macauley. “I thought when people’s iPhones got scratched, they were scratched forever That’s why we made these awesome products in the first place.” He then added, “Weird.”

As of publication, it is unclear as to whether the Screen Scratch Repair Industry’s generous benefits structure, high wages (in comparison to foreign counterparts), and considerable cost of providing medical coverage and health insurance to retirees are also significant contributing factors to the industry’s woes.

A dynamic, modern, carbon-free, and totally amazing company, Krypton is fundamentally aware of the fact that you love your gadgets. A California company, Krypton is committed to protecting your envied collection of technological marvels while ensuring style, function, and fashion are still fully addressed. Apart from selling fashionable, practical, and brilliantly designed iPhone accessories, Krypton’s Random Acts of Greenness movement encourages waste consciousness in everyone and aims to one day make “leaving lights on because you’re too lazy to get up” and “driving one mile to get to work” a thing of the past. For more information about Krypton’s Screen Armor Products, please visit: http://www.kryptonproducts.com.

Question: Why should we give you free stuff?

Alright, now for a little something different.

Screen Armor Ultra Clear

I want to give away some free Krypton stuff, but don’t really have a good reason to. So here’s the deal:

Tell me why I should give you some free iPhone Screen Protectors, and if I like what you have to say, I’ll send you one…if not, tough luck Jack!

Here’s what I’m looking for:

1) Interesting stories about how you (or a friend) scratched your screen and how you (or your friend) were devastated about it (I will consider fictitious stories as well…as long as they’re creative)

2) Suggestions about what accessories you want for you iPhone in the future and a 5 point plan for super happy iPhone usage

3) Your stories about how you simply NEED one of these products to survive (we DO accept begging, pleading, and bribes…as long as it’s creative…and nothing sexually explicit please, let’s keep this PG)

Here’s your choice of fabulous prizes should I, in my infinite generosity, graciously choose to send you something.

Screen Armor Privacy 360

Screen Armor Privacy 180 (Same as the 360, but does not include top to bottom privacy, only side to side)

Screen Armor Anti-Glare

Screen Armor Ultra-Clear

I would write descriptions for all of these, but I was lazy and chose to link to our site instead.

Looking forward to hearing from you!

All you have to do is comment! I’m looking forward to this, don’t let me down people!

Top 5 Reasons to Not Protect Your iPhone

We all know it makes sense to functionally accessorize our gadgets, but few actually take the time and effort to protect the technological marvels they love so much. To the point, we all know someone who has cracked an iPhone screen or scratched a camera lens (we may have even experienced this depressing scenario ourselves). Yet, many hold fast and refuse to buy a simple device that could save money and heartbreak.

With this in mind, I’d like to give my top 5 reasons not to protect your iPhone.

5) You’re too lazy to go to the store - Never underestimate the power of a sofa. Simply put, pure laziness is crippling to the iPhone accessory industry. I’ve created a complicated algorithm that has estimated that the number of iPhone screen protectors and cases that would be purchased if laziness was not a factor would be 100 billion times more than the number of iPhone screens and cases sold today. That’s several billion more than the number of iPhones ever even created…wow, something to think about.

4) You like spending money on expensive electronics you’ve already purchased once (or twice)- Hey, whatever floats your boat. I like spending money on food, beverage, car payments, rent, etc. So who am I to judge?

3) You’re a purist – You like having things the way they are. You don’t need any fancy shmancy protective case for the inevitable moment when you drop your phone.  After all, cases and protective screens undermine Apple’s brilliant design team.

2) You prefer the warn-in look - Vintage and warn-in everything is what’s “in” these days. This applies to gadgets too. In such case, may I recommend also ripping the stereo out of your car and putting a few coffee stains on that new rug. Wow, looking stylish already!

1) Cases and Screen Protectors look stupid – Seems like a legitimate argument. But since there’s literally dozens of iPhone accessory sellers with literally hundreds of different cases and screens to choose from, I have a hard time believing every single one of them doesn’t suit your taste. But, what do I know.

So there it is. If you ever needed an excuse to not protect your iPhone, now you have it. And just in case you’re not buying the argument..maybe you’ll help us (and yourself) out by checking out Krypton’s Screen Armor line. I hear they have some pretty cool stuff.

Happy Earth Day

Greetings Interweb,

Today is April 22nd which means Earth Day!

I spent a long time thinking today about what Earth Day is, what it isn’t, and what it could be.

What Earth Day IS:

• It’s day where people maybe think a little bit more about their surroundings. In a local, community, and global sense.

• It’s a day where, though reminded several times on the radio, internet, and TV, lots of people probably don’t even realize it’s earth day.

• It’s a day where children in school yards plant flowers and trees but forget to do it again the year after

• It’s a day where some bike to work, but other still drive, make excessive copies, and litter

What Earth Day ISN’T

• It isn’t a day to be wasteful

• It isn’t a day to be cynical

• It isn’t a political statement

• It isn’t a day to leave on the lights or run the air conditioning all day

What Earth Day Could Be:

• It Could be a day where people appreciate the world they live in

• It Could be a day where you clean up your neighborhoold

• It Could be a day to  bike to work (and get those legs in shape)

• It Could be a day to not politicize global warming and simply do something nice for the world

• It Could be a day to spend with your family and do something good

• It Could be a day to stop and smell the roses (literally and figuratively)

Ok, for my last bit of preaching, I implore you go to this website http://green.yahoo.com/ and make it your homepage. Even if you only read 1/2 of one article a day, you’ll become more knowledgeable about the environment and start to become more conscious of your consumption. At least that’s what happened to me.

I’ll leave you with some of my favorite Earth Day YouTube Videos.

What is Earth Day to you? What is it not? What could it be?

(I especially like the obnoxious music)

(Good ideas, not-so-good mustache)

Random Act of Greenness 3/17/09

Ok, so I realize it’s April right now and I’m posting a video from March, but I’ve been busy saving the world in other ways, so you’ll get no apology from me.

So California is in the middle of a serious water shortage and I’ve shown a very simple way to save a little bit of water here.

(If you don’t have your own plants by the way, you should get some. They’re good for you and they make great pets and you don’t even have to deal with all the shedding – though there is a bit of “pot”ty training….god I love puns)

Ok, here’s your video:

Feel free to go to youtube and post your own videos by the way.  The world would appreciate it (and you’ll be famous like me…er…which is almost as famous as Brangelenia or whatever its called)

By the way, I promise I’ll start writing more about iPhones and Apple products, I’m just waiting for our website to get finalized. Thanks for your patience, I know you’ve been checking this everyday 20 times a day waiting for more info about Krypton.

Talk to you soon.

Random Act of Greenness 03/26/09

With Earth Hour just around the corner, I thought it appropriate to show a (very) simple way to save energy everyday in your home (you may even be able to do this without ever leavging your couch, a definite plus for all you reality TV fans out there).

So here’s what I did. I replaced a friend’s lightbult with a fancy smancy new CFL (Compact Fluorescent) light bulb. To be fair, it was a bit more expensive than a regular light bulb (about $5 a bulb), but it’s lifespan and energy efficiency is (pardon the term) “light”years ahead of traditional incandescent bulbs.

Some of my favorite random facts about these bulbs:

• They Can save a household 260 pounds of carbon dioxide a year
• They Cost savings over the lifetime of the bulb is about $63 (because of the increased lifespan)
• They generally use 50-80% less energy than their incandescent counterparts
• They look kinda weird and funky fresh (if you’re into that sort of thing)

For more information about these types of bulbs or other green products check out Green Home.

As a final note before I load the video, these random acts are not just for the environmentally superconscious! This concept is meant for everyday, normal busy people who know very little about environmentalism (like myself). Krypton’s Random Acts of Greenness  is only meant to help make people more conscious about being wasteful, not turn you into a total treehugger, nor to make some heavy handed political statement. So before you get defensive or tell me why global warming is a hoax, please just take a minute and reflect on how wasteful we can be (and often are) as a society and think of very simple little things you can do to help. This is all I ask: Less than 10 seconds a day for a “Random Act of Greenness”. Please at least consider it  : )

By the way, waste by definition is inefficient, and inefficiency is a thief (meaning it hurts your wallet!). The point here is that there are very reasonable and pragmatic reasons to think about going green (and it doesn’t have to be politicized or about the apocalypse or anything like that).

Ok, without further adieu, here’s my video…enjoy:

Random Act of Green 03/20/09

Just riding my bike and doing my part (and working on that leg/glut definition)

I’d love to see you post your own? Or at least tell me about a time when you’ve done something good for the environment…Or maybe about what you had for breakfast.

Hypothetical: Would Superman buy an iPhone??

The Argument

Superman can certainly do many things. Extraordinary things. Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Reverse the rotation of the earth (depending on which Superman universe you’re into). Et cetera. But my question is this dear readers: Would Superman buy an iPhone?

Let’s break it down a little:

1) Superman’s Powers and some background-

Superman is an alien lifeform who draws power from the yellow sun of the earth. He can fly, has x-ray vision, has super speed (and is at least as fast as the flash…the faster of the two is still up for debate), has super strength, is impervious to non-magical attacks (a big plus since magical attacks are fairly rare here on earth),  lazer eyes (undoubtedly cool), super hearing, and freeze breath…just to name a few.

Let me tell you what I don’t see on this list of superman’s “powers”. Unlimited internet access. High resolution camera. GPS . Weather reports. Music storage. Up to the minute stock quotes. Touch screen navigation. Endless access to useful apps. Multiple email account management. And a sleek design (much more than I can say for Superman’s wrestler outfit) Clearly, this phone can do many many things Superman cannot. “Hey Superman, seen that new youtube video with the kittens? No? Hmmm. Pitty.” “Hey Superman, do you think it’s gonna rain tomorrow? Not sure? Oh, well, um…thanks anyways.” Superman can eat it!  Clearly, Superman can’t do everything this piece of modern terrestrial technology can.

iPhone 1   Superman 0

2) Superman goes by the allias Clark Kent and works for a newspaper called the Daily Planet  in a city called Metropolis-

The real question here is: Would an iPhone make Superman a better reporter? The answer, undoubtedly yes. Just because you’re “faster than a speeding bullet” doesn’t mean you’re as fast as the speed of light. Superman might be as fast as the flash, but email is faster. If I’m Superman and I’m doing some investigative report on lions in Africa or something and I need to send some critical information back to Lois at the office. I sure as heck aint going to fly all the way back to effing Metropolis to drop off the paperwork. I’m going to email it like a normal person. No iPhone, no email. Sorry “Clark”.

iPhone 2   Superman 0

3) Superman is vitrually indestructable and is only weakened by an element from his home planet of Krypton called Kryptonite

Ok, so the iPhone isn’t indestructable. But at least it can survive next to a crummy rock. Let’s say Lex Luthor had a big hunk of Kryptonite and was just hanging out by superman. Superman would get all weak and start flopping on the ground like a soccer player. Meanwhile, his iPhone would be just sitting in his pocket (or in his spandex somewhere) just ready to save the day. “Hey Superman, need to send Lois a quick text to come save your sorry butt?” He could even use one of the many “emergency button Applications” that let’s authorities know you’re in trouble and where you are (they exist, and they’re free). Jeez Superman, looks like an iPhone just saved your life.

iPhone 3     Superman 0

4) Superman’s arch nemesis is a scrawny bald guy nammed Lex Luthor. A mad scientist bent on world domination.

We can safely assume that Lex Luthor has no connection with Steve Jobs. Jobs is far too smart a business man to get involved with scum like Luthor. And while Luthor might have some real crazy lazers and other destruction machines, I havn’t seen any evidence of him getting involved in cellular technology design or manufacturing. What does this mean for Superman? He can actually have a heads up on Luthor! Perhaps even give Luthor an iPhone (as a Trojan Horse style peace offering) and then hack into his GPS so he could know his location at any time! Or use the iPhone to get up to date information about Luthor’s wrongdoing from anywhere. Just because you have super hearing doesn’t mean you can pin point Luther’s crimes against humainty from anywhere. Super hearing *scoff*.

iPhone 4     Superman 0

Well  dear readers, there you have it. Clearly Superman would be able to do his job more effectively if he had an iPhone. Now the only question I have is: Did we do something wrong in naming our iPhone accessory company Krypton? Would it bring up too many hard feelings about his home planet? Or would he consider it a tribute to his native land? If so, maybe we could even get him to do a testimonial…wow, talk about good press. That would be super indeed.

Thanks for reading.

Do you think Superman would buy an iPhone?

Why Online Shopping is Greener (and more awesome) than Traditional Retail

I read an interesting study recently about why shopping online is greener than shopping via traditional retail. The study’s findings aren’t terribly surprising if you think about it, but interesting nonetheless. They even took into account some less obvious differences in the two models (e.g. energy usage in the data center to run the e-commerce web site, different uses of packaging from the wholesaler to the consumer, and energy use in the traditional retail store).

At the end of the day, the study boiled down to this:

In terms of CO2 emissions, participating in the traditional retail model (rather than the ecommerce model) will on average result in more environmental harm due to driving to and from the retail outlet (this includes CO2 emissions from packaging materials and energy consumption).

What this means:

We have yet another reason to love online shopping! (some of my favorites include: not waiting in line with screaming kids, direct price comparison, endless access to information thanks to our friends at Google, and avoiding the awful and excruciating experience of driving in traffic). You can also think of this as more time to spend with the people you care about at home or watching crazy reality shows (if that’s your thing).

Anyways, here’s some other highlights from the study:

• The traditional retail distribution model, combined with factors such as product packaging and customers driving to and from stores, resulted in greater energy consumption and carbon dioxide emissions than in the Buy.com online shopping model.

• The largest contributors to energy consumption and carbon dioxide emissions were from customer transport for traditional retail, and packaging and ‘last mile’ delivery to customer homes for ecommerce.

• Approximately 65% percent of total emissions generated by the traditional retail model stemmed from customer transport to and from retail stores.

• Although the possible range of CO2 emissions overlap significantly in the two systems, it is unlikely for the retail system to ever have lower emissions than the ecommerce system

The moral of the story is:

Shop online when you can (it saves time, money, and the environment).

Your thoughts?